Here, now, this, and that

Do you think it is cruel for us to pump our kids full of ideas like:

You can do anything you want to do;
You are a sweet and special snowflake who can be anything if you just set you mind to it;
You are a brilliant artist/wonderful reader/curious scientist/extraordinary mathematician etc.

I think it is. The reality is that no matter how hard we work, how smart, or how talented we are, many of us won't find fulfillment in our occupations despite the grandiosity of our dreams. All that time we spent in school learning American history and algebra will keep us from saying something stupid at the staff potluck or teach us how to figure out how to double our favorite recipe, but will it really get us to a place in life that will allow us to be extraordinary in some way? Even if it does, will that bring happiness? Why tell a child that they are extraordinary just for being an ordinary kid? If we are very lucky we will find work that pays the bills and provides time and extra cash for travel and drinking interesting cocktails and eating amazing food. The real fulfillment in life if we are really lucky will be from enjoying the people we fill our personal lives with no matter what occupational heights we reach.

I'm starting to think that it is far more important to teach our kids how to have meaningful relationships and how to be kind and respectful. If only I knew how to do that. I'm not saying that working hard and applying yourself at school is mutually exclusive from building strong friendships. I'm saying that all of the emphasis of childhood seems to be on building an academically and athletically strong child, rather than one who can maintain friendships and show empathy, and be a good member of a community, and recognize the entirety of the world and the smallness of their place in it.